[MR] newbie

[Karen]

> Any suggestions?

Well, suggestion #1 would be, Don't Post To Mailing Lists Under Bogus
Email Addresses ... it makes it very difficult to send you a private
reply. :P

Suggestion #2: Get in touch with your local chatelaine (or hospitaller)
-- they may be able to help you too.

Suggestion #3: I generally advise newcomers to attend local activities
-- practices, workshops, meetings, etc. -- before they go to events. 
This gives you an opportunity to meet people who share your interests,
and to find out what events will be coming up that they will be going
to (or that will appeal to your interests).

Suggestion #4: I know it's hard when you're new, but please *do*
approach people.  You mentioned that

> No one ever approached me unless I approached them.

It may sound odd, but few SCAdians can actually sense that someone is a
newcomer just by looks.  (Unless you were flashing a Beacon of
Being-New, or something like that.) ;)  But if someone is being shy, or
not approaching other people, sometimes other people take it as a sign
that the person doesn't *want* to be approached or socialized with.

It's like being a child at a new elementary school.  Is it better to
make friends by sitting alone in a corner of the playground and not
talking to anyone else, or would it be better to *talk* to people? :)

Yes, there are some people/groups that aren't doing a whole lot of
reaching out to new folks.  It's a problem, and it's something that
some folks just need to work on.  But sadly, my lack of powers in the
mind-reading department means that I do not know whether the
less-friendly people you'd approached were perhaps busy or preoccupied,
forgetful, shy or less than outgoing, or what.  There are LOTS of
people who come off as terribly unfriendly, and most of them probably
not realize that they seemed that way.

If you'd like to chat with me about this, I am on AoL Instant Messenger
(KarenLarsdatter).  I am the newcomers' coordinator in Stierbach, one
of the northern Virginia chapters of the SCA.  Stierbach does tend to
have a LOT of new folks, so a lot of us do what we can to encourage new
folks to feel comfortable in the SCA, and to find activities that they
enjoy doing, and other people who share their interests.

Karen

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