[MR] How does one deal with difficult children of nobility?
enequy at adelphia.net
enequy at adelphia.net
Mon Feb 5 10:15:39 PST 2007
At the time of the writing of my email the only responses were of a child bullying other children. That was not addressed in the initial paragraph but in the following ones. It was the child of an important person trying to bully an adult. I would like to address the first and in a way the complete email.
It does not make any difference if the child is a child of someone that has a royal ranking, on the throne or not, or is a prominent person in the structure of the kingdom - they should not be bullying an adult! If this happens and is not addressed to the parents at an appropriate time it will continue. Children learn from everyone. They have to learn by proper positive AND negative re-enforcement.
As mentioned for a court situation the person might be royals or someone else of importance supporting the royals during court (herald or retainers). If the child intends to interrupt the court for non-emergency situations you can tell the child it is not the correct time to do so. And recommend for them to wait until after court. But you cannot physically stop them. But if the child does interrupt the court then it is your responsibility to let the respective parent know of your recommendations to the child before hand. AND any bullying attitude that came with it, if applicable. I is up to the parent at that time.
In ALL things we do it is courtesy and diplomacy among every person in our group - no matter what age. And by our (parents, friends, associates) actions we teach the children. And children more than adults will always test the envelope of their perceived behavioral limitations.
And I hope I have addressed this in a manner that will not be insulting to anyone that reads it.
Enequy
Honour, Valour, Knowledge, and Service
---- Jennifer Dobyns <jendobyns at verizon.net> wrote:
> Greetings unto the Tavern,
>
> I am sorry, I cannot think of a more delicate way to ask the question
> in the subject line. So there it is.
>
> Let's just say this is a hypothetical situation. A child whose
> parent is "somebody" decides that s/he wishes to interrupt court for
> a non-emergency. S/he is advised that it would be inappropriate to
> do so just now, that the situation for which s/he desires to
> interrupt court can be easily dealt with to his/her satisfaction once
> court is over (a matter of a few minutes). S/he then tells the adult
> in a way that implies "you'd better not mess with me or it will be
> very bad for you" that his/her parent is an "important person" and
> that s/he can go in and interrupt if s/he so wishes. The issue here
> is not his/her interrupting court (there could be a very valid
> understanding about this between parent and child), _it is that s/he
> feels it is appropriate to adopt a threatening attitude about being
> able to do so because s/he has a parent of rank within the society_.
>
> This same child has acted in a bullying way to other children in the
> children's area during the day as well, shoving them aside as s/he
> chooses to get to things s/he wishes to see/do or just, apparently,
> to take away what is pleasing others (a cry for attention, perhaps,
> in all cases?).
>
> What should one do? I can see the potential for a parent to be in
> such a state of denial about their child's behavior that any bearer
> of bad tidings could be in serious trouble. I suspect that in such a
> case as the one set out above that it could be that the child really
> needs/wants attention and has found a way of manipulating the system
> within the society to get it and that the parent might be completely
> clueless that this is going on. But being threatening towards
> another adult is troubling. Bullying other children is troubling.
> And what message is this sending to the other young members of the
> society?
>
> Food for thought, eh?
>
> Genevieve D'Aubigne
> who is currently dealing with her own sometimes difficult child
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