[MR] Questions On Non-binary Pronouns

[Rachael Stein]

Yes, my daughter, who's a she/her but very gender ambiguous, has often been
referred to as "the young Gentle." That's third person, of course, but I
think just Gentle or Noble could work in second person.

On Mon, Apr 21, 2025 at 7:49 AM Leesa Orton via Atlantia <
atlantia at seahorse.atlantia.sca.org> wrote:

> If I understand your question correctly, non-binary titles for
> non-Armigerous Atlantians include the title “Gentle”, and “Noble” is often
> used for those who have received their Award of Arms. As you mentioned,
> “Your Excellency” covers a lot of ground, including those who have served
> as Baronage and Crown.
> Molly
>
> Sent from my iPhone
>
> > On Apr 21, 2025, at 07:35, Garth Groff and Sally Sanford via Atlantia <
> atlantia at seahorse.atlantia.sca.org> wrote:
> >
> > Noble friends,
> >
> > Having an open discussion about any topic is rare on the Merry Rose, but
> > there is a question that is of interest to me, and should be to us all.
> > That topic is how we use pronouns and honorifics to address members who
> are
> > non-binary. It is a source of confusion for me, but one which I am
> prepared
> > to tackle to make all our friends feel comfortable and welcome.
> >
> > So how do we address someone who is non-binary or transgender without
> > giving them offense? We have at least one member locally who I am told
> > prefers the "you, them, they" combination. That works in real life, and
> > although I may stumble with it a bit, I am certainly willing to address
> > them as they wish.
> >
> > But in the SCA our shtick is to greet one another as M'lord or M'lady.
> This
> > could be very confusing when dealing with non-binary folks, and may not
> be
> > what that member prefers. The first time I encountered this question was
> > while running the archery range at WoW several years ago and met someone
> > who was obviously gender blended. As politely as possible I asked them
> what
> > their preference would be. Their answer was, it didn't matter to them. I
> > would like to believe that they were pleased I would at least try to be
> > accomodating.
> >
> > Though not in my shire, I have a nodding acquaintance with someone who is
> > apparently non-binary and is now a baron/baroness. When we occasionally
> > meet I can safely use "Your Excellency", and dodge the bullet, but this
> is
> > a rare situation.
> >
> > In some written or referential uses, we have a possible answer through
> the
> > neutral term "honorable". "The Honored Lord" or "The Honored Lady"
> (without
> > any context for non-binary usage) was still occasionally heard when I
> first
> > joined 18 years ago. I was told its use was being discouraged, and indeed
> > it has been several years since I have heard the term. Perhaps it is time
> > we brought this back into general use, not strictly for those who are
> > non-binary, but an alternative form of address for anybody and can thus
> > include those who are non-binary or gender-blended without offering
> offence.
> >
> > I would welcome anyone on this board to share their views, keeping in
> mind
> > good will to all on what may be a sensitive issue.
> >
> > Yours Aye,
> >
> > Mungo Napier, Laird of Mallard Lodge  🦆
> > Continuing a crusade to keep the original Merry Rose relevant and in
> > business.
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