[MR] Fw: A Letter from King Richard

[Jim]

That is entirely too funny!!  A tip of the hat to the originator for just the right kind of twisted humor.
 
Mathias

--- On Fri, 2/5/10, James Matterer <jlmatterer at yahoo.com> wrote:


Read it all, if you dare......

Begin forwarded message:
> 
> 
> Richard I, by the grace of God, august King of England, sends his most kind greetings.
> 
> Because I know that you especially desire to hear from me and to learn the state of my prosperity, I think it fitting to first tell you of this.
>  Due to our most precarious state, I ask that you maintain the utmost secrecy regarding this sensitive correspondence.
> 
> I have hidden in France a large sum of foreign gold worth at least 300,000 pounds silver. Regretfully, I find myself unable to convey this wealth back to England. To be brief, I have been imprisoned in Germany due to a hostile regime. In addition to the indignity of false imprisonment, Henry VI has demanded an unreasonably cruel ransom of 65,000 pounds silver.
> 
> Therefore, I offer the following arrangement. If you will send the ransom of 65,000 pounds silver to Henry VI, on my release I shall procure the aforementioned gold. On our return to England, you shall receive one half of the foreign gold I carry. Let my seal on this letter be proof of my honesty in this matter. Once more, I would entreat you to maintain the secrecy of this matter to better ensure that we return with the gold without interference.
> 
> 
> In brief therefore, God willing, I shall return to England. I render to you the gratitude which you deserve for the very great fidelity which you have shown to me. And with the full intention of worthily rewarding your services, I ask you to continue the same.
> 
> ---------------
> Aoife, feeling ... umm...  inspired by those curious Nigerian fellows & taking a break from practicing for K&Q Bardic.  Opening & closing phrasing stolen ruthlessly from King Conrad of Germany:http://www.fordham.edu/halsall/source/1148conrad2.html  
> 
> We now return you to your regularly scheduled 21st century spam.