[MR] Nekkid noobs, smoking

[Lady Hannah]

I'll add one more to Rani Dulcinea's very well-spoken message if I may...

Those of you with experience and history in the game ... please please
please MENTOR. I've seen it happen countless times to myself and others. The
new person gets involved, one or two people are nice to them (maybe),
happiness ensues, then they get completely gung-ho and take on EVERYTHING at
once. Give it three to six months tops and they fizzle out and completely
hate the game. Cut that time in half if they are "trying" to keep the spouse
interested (or spark the interest) as well and someone says something nasty
to the spouse at an event. Try convincing someone to drive you five hours to
an event when they have had a negative experience ... ha, good chance that.

But please ... just MENTOR. You don't have to be a Peer to take someone
under your metaphorical wing. Most new people would be flattered for someone
to take an interest in them and try to help them manage their time or
projects, help them focus on one thing at a time (when in the beginning
EVERYTHING is exciting and interesting), connect them with people who have
neat projects the new person might be interested in.

When you're new, you really have no idea what the possibilities are or where
to find people or resources. Not everyone is a Googleholic. If you're
experienced, please step in and offer help if you see someone heading off in
the wrong direction at 200 mph.

I've "started over" three times in two different Kingdoms and always made
the same mistakes. I just wish more people gave a little more than lip
service to the "helping newcomers" idea. Saying hi and telling them who to
bow to at their first event, then never speaking to them again is not
"helping newcomers" ... the real newcomers you need to pay attention to are
the ones who are at their fourth or fifth event and JUST starting to "get
it" ... that's the danger zone.


Yours,
Lady Hannah of Cyddlain Downs
(a currently burned-out, formerly new person, married to a thoroughly
disgruntled ex-SCAdian)