[MR] Personal Responsibility & Sexual Harrassment (Re: Society Notice)

[Scribe0002 at aol.com]

In a message dated 4/11/2007 11:13:27 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,  
bmcdaniel1 at sc.rr.com writes:

This  type of blanket statement is what makes it so hard in today's society
for  true survivors of any form of interpersonal violence (sexual  harassment,
sexual assault, domestic violence, etc) to feel safe in coming  forward and
telling their story. In general, people who are victims of  these types of
situations feel ashamed and embarrassed, and automatically  feel like the
world will look down upon them. By making a statement that  the sexual
harassment card is abused, you are telling innocent people that  they will
automatically not be believed if they come forward with a  complaint. As a
side note, the Penn State definition that was cited is only  accurate for the
state of Pennsylvania. Laws very, sometimes drastically,  depending on which
state you are in. 



Good Lord Brian, first, that definition is not PA's definition, it is the  
federal definition. Yes, states have other clarifications and caveats, but we're 
 talking about a cross-state border organization and the federal definition 
is  the only one that applies across the board.
 
Second and more importantly, please understand that I am not discounting in  
any way real abuse or harassment. However, it is not statements such as mine  
that cause those who come forward to be doubted but the fact that there is  
abuse of the accusation. Something that makes you uncomfortable is not  
harassment. Something that continues after that discomfort is made evident  is.
 
My point is that you need to know what the legal offense is and to take  
personal responsibility in that situation where they can. I may be  embarrassed or 
ashamed, though in a verbal exchange I don't see what there is to  be 
embarrassed about or ashamed of if I were the listener and not a  participant.
 
You don't accuse someone of harassment for telling offensive jokes if you  
were sitting listening to them without speaking your mind. You, as the offended  
party, need to make that clear at that time. That's an important element in  
social interaction.
 
If someone persists at that time or continues such offensive talk at a  later 
date, ~that~ is harassment and should be dealt with as such. But giving  
carte blanche to anyone who hears offensive talk to lodge a complaint a week  
after the fact when they said nothing at the time is a form of harassment in  
itself, m'lord.
 
~g



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