[MR] Travel travails TOP 10

[kevin taylor]

At +3,500 miles a week, Callidore's top 10 is:

<10> I-40 phoenix to albuquerque is so bad even the
trees get stoned.  petrified forest.  and so would
you - if you could.  sorry driver, disqualified. there is
color in the rocks. too heraldic.

<9> I-40 to I-95, is green and brown trees. more nudie
bar billboards than houses in sight. but its only 3 hours.
you couldnt quite gnaw off your arm during the drive.
longer than COURT at War of the Lillies

<8> Portage to La Cross WI is 3 hours.  a perfect history book
on CD. the lake mosquitos are mildly amusing splatting your
windshield.  this IS entertainment; enblazon it.

<7> the ohio pike.  all of it.  thats I-80.  its a bad 4 hours
but there are people to bark at.  you can pass the
trip by rolling down your window and howling at
passers. only talented and multiple trippers should
attempt dropping trou for the "70 mph flying moon"
for those of you who prefer High Def try 55 mph.

<6>  I-70 from Denver to Kansas City is 11 hours
of rolling labotomy.  120 foot total drop.  not
a visable curve. wait a sec,  yes, there is a "Biggest
prairie dog musem," behind a Sinclair gas station...
hmmm, Ermine anyone?

<5> I-80 omaha to cheyenne. is 8 hours in which to break
your radio search function.  a 3 mile bluff and a single river.
great plains do roll. and so does your radio; only 2 country
staions. cell phone reception? bathrooms?  ha! its medieval!

<4> I-94 From Fargo ND to Billings MT via Bismark
is deafening in its solitude also but thats
only 10 hours.  met 3 cars.  8 inch prarie dog
mounds can be picked out on the flat horizon. ive seen
teenagers stop at rest stops and tie Leslie Fish Audio Tape to
the Mileage post and drive off unreeling it, with another
snipped and tied to the tape housing of the first, case
layed on the roof, spools off when pulled.  miles
of entertainment.

Now Edric and Barre have quality submissions, BUT
heres where the good gets separated from the psychotic.

<3> Eagle Pass Tx to El Paso Tx.  hwy 90.  Classic West Texas,
not even tumbleweeds. only pebbles and dust.  10 hours in which
the road plays peak-a-boo twice as its buried under "loess" from
dust storms, ya just drive cross country 9 miles each time. vultures
circle. some scrub.  you could die, no one would notice.

<2> Boise Idaho to Las Vegas Nevada. Shortest Legal Distance: 13
hours in which there is no named town, only 2 lanes of you and
tumble weeds.  american arid plains. Battle Mountain township
can be heard on 10 meter + 50 miles away at one point. cars
do not have fuel capability to execute this trip.

BLACKTOP BRAWL:
<1> Canada 16: winnipeg manitoba to edmonton alberta. 17 hours
in which you could use "the club" to secure your steering wheel
and set your cruise. make a peanut butter and jelly, eat it.
drink your grape faygo, then release the club, and knock the
cruise off of 70.  i awoke to witness it.  then i demanded we stop.
then the above name sake.

whats in your travel wallet?

callidore

>My submission would be I-70 through Kansas (doesn't' even have the Indiana
>hills) or I-40 between Phoenix and Albuquerque (and probably through
>Texas.).
>
>Barre

> >Scripsit Alisoun:
> > > And the space on I-95 between I-26 and Florence is the looongest and
> >most
> > > sleep inducing stretch of road in the universe. . .
> >
> >Hmmm. I think I-40 between I-95 and Wilmington NC gives that stretch of 
>95
> >a run for its money.
> >
> >Evan
>
>Not even in the ballpark.  Try the Ohio Turnpike, in its entirety, or I-70
>across Nebraska...Omaha to Cheyenne, Wyoming is about 10 hours in an
>absolute straight line, no turns no hills no trees nothin'.
>
>I-94 from Portage, WI to La Crosse is pretty bad, too.  'Course, I always
>seem to be driving that at night, which doesn't help.
>
>I-65 from Gary to Indianapolis is also soul-crushingly dull, though
>mercifully only a couple hours long.  I-5 from LA to San Fran is also
>mind-numbing, but at least the weather is usually nice.
>
>Eadric the Potter,
>who drives a lot

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