[MR] Does anyone remember this one?

[thatursula at aol.com]

 The Man Who Wouln't Die 
by Sir cipriano d'Alvarez
mka Guy Bradley 
I've armored up a thousand times for
Country and for King
And many's the tale that I could tell
Or song that I could sing.
I've fought in Beltane's driving rain
And struggled for each breath;
At Salt Wars and Oleno where
We damn near froze to death.
I've had my share of bruises and 
I've watched the arrows fly, 
But the strangest thing I've ever seen 
Was the man who wouldn't die. 
He stood a tow'ring seven feet
A giant among men.
His armor was of twelve-gauge steel
His hide it was of ten.
>From a land most far away he came,
Their champion and King,
And many crafty ways he had 
To make your helmet ring.
The battle lines they soon were joined 
And much to my surprise,
I was locked in single combat with
The man who wouldn't die. 
We circled round a time or two
Then I opened up the show
With an underhanded wrist shot which
Is still my favorite blow.
He didn't even try to block, 
Just brought that great sword down
And split my helm completely from
The chin up to the crown.
And thought my sword was still entrapped 
In the dent made in his side,
"What a mighty Knight" his people cheered
"Is the man who wouldn't die." 
Full four and twenty fighters fell
Before his awesome might,
And though many blows did land it seems
That every one was light.
The battle soon was over and 
By God's own blood he went
Off to the sides to doff his gear
And hammer out the dents.
The second battle soon began
And I took another try,
Bearing a sword named "Rhino's Bane"
For the man who wouldn't die. 
For "Rhino's Bane" was a special blade
Immortals for to cow.
And if he had not felt those blows
He'd damn well feel one now!
Three feet of rattan I center drilled
Then hollowed out the head
And filled that hole with six or maybe
Seven pounds of lead.
A single shop was all I'd get;
I raised that sword on high,
And buried it within the helm 
Of the man who wouldn't die. 
He didn't even bat an eye
Just calmly struck me down,
And then went on to clear the field
Of Squires, Knights and Crown.
I pondered why this man was not 
A'stretched out on the dirt;
I guess a head shot does no good
With nothing there to hurt.
The third engagement was delayed
To give the chiurgeons time
To pry the sword from out the head
Of the man who wouldn't die. 
A battle deep within the woods 
Was the last fight of the day
And the men remaining on my side
Went on their knees to pray.
"Oh Lord, if you care for us,
Allow your moon to fall,
Upon this man for that would be
The only blow he'd call."
But as we marched atop a hill
A plan occurred which I
Thought maybe could lead to the death
Of the man who wouldn't die. 
Upon this hill there lay a stone
A full six feet in girth.
"Oh gather round my fighters bold
We'll bring this man to earth!
Ten stalwart lads I need with me to
Strike the final blow,
While the rest shall keep behemoth here
Occupied below.
And when he stops to fight you
>From up above will fly
This boulder full upon the frame
Of the man who wouldn't die." 
It happened just as I foresaw
>From out the woods he ran
And stopped there right below us as 
According to the plan
The men below fought bravely while 
The men above did strain
To send that boulder from the hill
Onto his alleged brain.
At last the stone it stirred to life
And with a final pry,
We sent that boulder on its way
To the man who wouldn't die. 
Knocking trees to left and right
That fearsome missile sped
And with a final bounce it came
To rest upon his head.
His arms and legs were all that we could see beneath the stone.
But when we came from atop the hill 
We heard our victim groan.
Astounded, round bout we stood
As day bled into night,
And heard him say one final time:
"My Lords, that blow was light." 
 
-----Original Message-----
From: oldstormcrow at aol.com
To: Atlantia at atlantia.sca.org
Sent: Tue, 06 Sep 2005 11:42:53 -0400
Subject: [MR] Does anyone remember this one?


Does anyone here remember the words to the poem "The Man Who Wouldn't Die"? It's 
been quite a while since I heard it.
                     Thanks,
                              Baron Arkein
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