[MR] ISO of the Perfect SCAdian

[Judee St.Clair]

Good day to all--

   I am very new to the Society -- I suspect, therefor, that my perspective isn't going to count for much. This is especially true considering that I know almost nobody here, and have had no time or history to form either bias or prejudice towards anyone.

   I think the SCA and its gatherings are a bit different from the reenactment groups I've noticed before. The civil war reenactors I've known have had non-participating observers, always--their reenactments are often performaces, in that way. The SCA, from what I've seen, mostly has a complete participation policy at gatherings -- "we" (if I may be so bold as to include myself) expect everyone attending a real event/gathering to be involved in the event/gathering, in a Period way. Though there are presentations and exhibitions, they don't seem to be the bulk of what is done here.

   I am surprised at a msg I read the other day (suggesting a printed version of all correct research done in the SCA), wherein a fellow expressed upset that his research was as nothing, because it had been done already. I thought that we each were supposed to have the experience of researching whatever our interest -- from his message, it seemed to me that he thought his effort wasted, as would a graduate student upon finding that his thesis had already been published by another. I had understood that much of the value lay in the process of research, and the learning always valuable -- that even where a subject had been done before, one should still check out the sources presented by that person, so as to still gain personal value from that research.

   And the authenticity -- naturally, I am distressed at finding a tone that I must already be a perfect SCAdian. If I were, I would not need to research, but could instead come in and teach those already here. And if I were already a Perfect SCAdian, I hope I would also know how to teach without disdain for the wretches who were not already on the Absolutely One Correct Path. I would hope that the Perfect SCAdian could allow learning experiences for others who are not yet perfect.

   I have been mighty hesitant to participate in Gatherings and Events, because I am not only not in the same arena as the Perfect SCAdian, I am sure I am not even within a thousand leagues of woefully inadequate. At first, I was so excited at the thought of learning so much that I don't know -- how to spin and weave, to till and reap and put away, make my own . . . everything! . . . and how to fight as I have seen you all fight. (Physically, that is.) How to apply courtesy and courtliness to situations, putting individuals at their ease. How to fight (non-physically) in a genteel and magnanimous manner. And how to to do all this whilst having fun -- playing, as you say. The way I read it in the Known World Handbook. But then, it was published over 10 years ago. Things change?

   I feel that I am sounding as though I chide, and I don't mean to. Really, I am trying to politely express how scared I have become that I will be called out, or put down, or ridiculed. Or even thrown out, before I can learn a fraction of what you all already know. And evenso, I wanted so much to have fun while learning.

   But I will continue to follow these threads, and learn SOMETHING while I do so (in between 10-12 hour shifts, 6 days a week at my mundane job -- I know this should be no excuse, but it is what is happening, and at least one "excuse" for my laziness so far in my 5 months here). I think I should "lurk" for another year or two, before I even venture forth, because I am sure to offend or spoil it for the true SCAdians with my ineptness and lack of knowledge.

   I seek reassurance. Yet I am not sure there can be any. And what I've read here is really no different than I've seen at groups of other types, where those who came before (old-timers) are so unhappy with the newcomers who just don't get it, or get it right.

   I am so very grateful that the SCAdians where I live have been tolerant, gracious, and helpful. They have loaned, taught, and acted in a way that I want to emulate, moreso now than ever since I have read how they could have been otherwise. They sound and act just like the Known World Handbook described the Society, and I want to be more like them. I think I have figured out that I should stay right where I am, in the SCA, until  I have learned enough not to spoil it for those who no longer are like me. If I should have to move, I suspect I might be humiliated.

Regards,
Richikha