[MR] Wanna see my impression of Hamlet's dad?

[Oxford, David]

Greetings all,

If you feel insulted by Eric's earlier tirade, please read this...

As Renard very compassionately stated a bit ago, someone who is hurt and angry
is apt to lash out, whether justified or not.  Those in a more
emotionally-detached position (as nearly all of us are in this case) should not
allow words uttered in pain to insult us.  We know if the words are true or not,
and if not, then we can ignore them, and feel sympathy for the pain that someone
is enduring.  Hitting someone back who is already in pain and angry or fearful
accomplishes nothing and only further aggravates a situation (if they could
figure that one out in the Middle East, it'd be a much more peaceful place).

So please, no more sarcastic replies or rants of indignation.  Anger is part of
the grieving process, and we've all gone through it.  If you disagree with
Eric's assertions, then rest comfortably knowing that they are incorrect or are
at worst overly-broad generalizations, and resist the urge to slam him.  And if
in your own case you see any kernels of truth in them, take them to heart.
Lashing out often accompanies grief, and you have here someone feeling a lot of
grief.  Offer sympathy and kind understanding if you can, and if you can't,
offer your silence, comfortable in the knowledge that his words have not harmed
you unless you are so unsure of yourself that you allow them to.

Remember that with little more than compassion for the pain of others, our
community and our world could be a place of real peace.  Which is a part of why
I bothered to write this.  While this idea is true in this particular case, it
is also true in a much broader sense, and in a world filled with pain and fear
and those who would harm us simply that we would "understand their pain", take
the proactive step and be compassionate now.  Let your words and your actions
soothe hurt and anger, not add to them.  Save your fighting spirit for those who
would do you harm out of a calculated desire to advance themselves by your
suffering; offer kindness to those who lash out only in pain and anguish.  Be
strong in your own convictions so that words spoken in grief cannot harm you,
then offer that strength to those in grief, for they are in a weak time of their
lives.  Do this, and pray that when the tables are turned and it is you who are
suffering, others will treat you thusly.

Bryan
Obnoxious Peacenik

>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Julia Windsor [mailto:scawindsor1 at yahoo.com]
>> Sent: Monday, January 06, 2003 1:02 PM
>> To: atlantia at atlantia.sca.org
>> Cc: Eric Stoneking
>> Subject: Re: [MR] Wanna see my impression of Hamlet's dad?
>>
>>
>> --
>> [ Picked text/plain from multipart/alternative ]
>>
>> Would Eric Stoneking kindly tell this me what Utopian planet
>> he came from? I didn't know one existed and would like to
>> visit for a while.
>> Imagine, no insults from strangers and all husbands are
>> paragons. Wow, how do I get there? Come on, cough up the info.
>>
>>
>> Baroness Julia Windsor
>> - Argent, a portcullis and chief embattled azure
>> GoA, Order of the Kittyhawk, Order of the Boreas
>> Pursuivant At-Large
>> Waterbearer
>> =============================================================
>> ===========
>>                    The Merry Rose Tavern at Cheapside
>>     List Info: http://merryrose.atlantia.sca.org/
>>   Submissions: Atlantia at atlantia.sca.org
>> Subscriptions:
http://seahorse.atlantia.sca.org/mailman/listinfo/atlantia