[MR] Concerning sarcasm and emotion on lists (was re:heraldry)

[Ann]

Please indulge me in expressing my concerns about this and other SCA lists.

I wonder what leads us to speak and act electronically in a way that I do
not see in person?  I have heard it said it is the immediacy of the
electronic medium but that seems to excuse accountability.  Someone once
told me early on when I started using email (cause I got major flamed on
this list) to check and reread each post before sending in an attempt to be
clear.  I was even mailed an acceptable list of words and expressions.

Sarcasm, even though used often to express frustration, is also easy to see
as personally hurtful.  In my opinion (see I learned) should be used in a
public forum with foresight of this and caution.

However, what happened to:
"I can't believe he meant that the way it sounded to me." ( Benefit of the
Doubt)
"Did you mean ______ when you said _____." (validation of belief)
"Oh, cause that is what I 'heard' or 'perceived'. (accountability for one's
own reactions).

In the past few weeks I have seen some unfortunate threads on a number of
lists to which I belong.  I have come to expect any long thread to
degenerate into something unpleasant.

So, I wonder, can you remain informed without getting to this point on an
SCA list?

Dame Anne le Coeur, OP